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[Oct. 25th, 2004|03:33 am] |
For those of you reading this, you have reached the last post i will make on this journal. I dont know where or how, or the most important question which would be why, but (technically its today because its 3:36 in the morning) today around 7:30 im taking a test. this test is very important to my life.
I am no longer who i was, or am. the question is, will i still be who im supposed to?
I leave you with this.
T_R_U_S_T N_O_O_N_E |
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| new journal |
[Oct. 10th, 2004|12:01 am] |
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i have a new journal now. wont be using this one anymore. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2004|01:33 am] |
The cowboy kills the rock star
And Friday night's gone too far
The dim light hides the years
On all the faded girls
Forgotten but not gone
You drink it off your mind
You talk about the world
Like it's someplace that you've been
You see you'd love to run home,
but you know you ain't got one
Cause you're living in a world
that you're best forgotten around here... |
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| what a night |
[Oct. 8th, 2004|06:17 am] |
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Its now 6:17 in the morning. And i have not slept a wink. Had a pretty bad evening and night...but my late night rocked. listened to alot, a LOT of music, and with the help of an old friend, my night ended up rocking. Oh and i also talked to sara over the wee hours of the morning. good stuff. Im really fuckin tired, and i have to go to school in like an hour and its gonna suck, but its all good because if all goes according to plan, im hanging out with my old friend tomorrow after school. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 8th, 2004|02:17 am] |
They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told to you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew
And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway
Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown
And your mother loves your father
Cause she's got nowhere to go
And she wonders where these dreams go
Cause the world got in her way
What's the point in ever trying
Nothing's changing anyway
They press their lips against you
And you love the lies they say
And I tried so hard to reach you
But you're falling anyway
And you know I see right through you
Cause the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
You're not listening anyway |
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| and all thats left is the memory of a shadow |
[Oct. 7th, 2004|07:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  lonely | ] |
if i have any real friends out there, a call would be nice. im just sitting at home on my ass with nothing to do, noone to talk to. i hate it. i just wish for once someone would save me from myself, if that makes any sense. And if it doesnt, then i guess you cant really relate. my cellphones is quiet, my computer is a blank screen. this house is dark and empty. i feel alone and tired. and im tired of being alone.
This is my call
Do you hear me?
And if i fall
Will you be there to catch me? |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 6th, 2004|04:41 pm] |
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people always talk about heaven. they obviouslly dont know you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 4th, 2004|02:49 am] |
And on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you... |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 1st, 2004|07:19 pm] |
October. This can only mean one thing, halloween. I havent decided on one particular thing to be....but i have many crafty thoughts going through my head. And no, as long as you can still walk house to house and have the desire to get as much candy as possible and then eat maybe a fourth of it...then no, you're not too old to go trick or treating. I was thinking about this the other day. I've been the nerdiest things for halloween. When i was little i was a trash can. The next year i transformed that costume into a battery and my sister was the pink energizer bunny. Then i was an ewok ( from the original starwars, bitches ). If i do say so i look uber sexy with a tail. Humm, somewhere after that i was luke skywalker, then i was fox mulder ( x-files...only the best show ever ). Then i was harry potter a few years ago. mind you i still have that wand somewhere. Anyway, i dunno what im gonna be this year.
Anyway if you want to go trick-or-treating with me, leave me a note. it will be mad fun. |
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| No need for a title. |
[Sep. 27th, 2004|09:30 pm] |
Wake Up
Can You Hear Me?
You're so cleaver
Did you find me
In the backroom
In your closet
In your suitcase
There's no running
I will find you
Like the glacier
Cuts the seabed, leaving Canyons
In your cheekbones
passing through you
in the shadows, scenes undo you
Cut Your Ribbon
As it follows you
Everything, Everything
how can you sleep at night
As it falls apart
everything, everything
how can you sleep at night
Wake Up
Can You Hear Me?
You're so cleaver
Did you find me?
In the backroom
In your closet
In your suitcase
There's no running
I will find you
Like the glacier
Cuts the seabed, leaving Canyons
In your cheekbones
passing through you
in the shadows, scenes undo you
Cut Your Ribbon
As it follows you
Everything, Everything
how can you sleep at night
As it falls apart
everything, everything
how can you sleep at night |
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| holding on to feel the same. |
[Sep. 14th, 2004|12:05 am] |
This may never start.
We could fall apart.
And I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
Feelings insincere.
Can I be your memory?
So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.
This may never start.
I'll tear us apart.
Can I be your enemy?
Losing half a year.
Waiting for you here
I'd be your anything.
So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.
This may never start.
Tearing out my heart.
I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
(I'd be your memory)
Feelings insincere.
Can I be your memory?
So get back, back, back to where we lasted.
Just like I imagine.
I could never feel this way.
So get back, back, back to the disaster.
My heart's beating faster.
Holding on to feel the same.
This may never start.
We could fall apart
And I'd be your memory.
Lost your sense of fear.
Feelings insincere.
Can I be your memory?
Can I be your memory? |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2004|02:19 am] |
OH and i forgot, i might haev maybe hurricane party. But if you're afraid of going outside in strong winds of hurricane then you prolly wont wanna come, because i for one like to play in hurricanes. Maek papaer airplanes maybe. Oh shit nevermind rain fucks up paper. HHey im bored. hurricane hurricane im so happy! i love wind. wind is your friend. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA,. ok i go byebye time to go pass out.
i mean sleep....time to go to sleep..........
im such a l053r k1d. lol. im what you call a "fuck-up". Not to go on a pity party or anything, mind the tacky and uncool expression for a lack of better words. But its true....im just one big stupid fuckup. I kno i could be like fuckin doin good in school in shit....but you dojnt know me or how my mind thinks. I know its easy...just get up and do the work, but for soem reason my mind just takes the fuck over at morning time and its like no go back to bed...fuck school, even tho once im awake i kick myself in the ass for not going. thats my dilema. everyone thinkis i dont care, but i do....i just cant win...and i am my own enemy. its wierd and it sounds like bullshit, but i guess thats a logical reasoning. I wish someone could fucking relate vbecause i just cant fucking get out of bed. And on top of that i yhave a sleep insomnia and its here to stay till the day i die. hence why im up at fucking 2:30 in the morning. ok i really cant see what i type anymore its time to go. byebyebye (bye bye bye bye) i dont wanna be your fool, in this game for two. ohmigod where the fuck did a backstreet boys song come from. WTF ever happened to them did they break up or something? i dont even know....i listened to them back around pre-middle school. And yes, along with nsync. I dont give two shits if u think thats gay either. Because at the time, i loved it. Anyway, im a little drunk. FUCK i mean tired. tried. and as for today, well....i dont know if it was a good day or a bvad day. It wasnt really either.....i feel like a dissappointment, and i know im right. I can never keep anything right. I can do it for awhile but thern i just gufkcing givee up and its ohmigod alcohol just hit me. ok time to go bye. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2004|02:17 am] |
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im bored. at 2 in the morning. but just as i started making this entry, i realized i should probly go to sleep. this is why we dont drink vodka, kids...we forget things. sunkist owns you. strawberry sunkist and strawberry twist owns you. you're owned, you fuckhed. |
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| friday+noplans+alittlehorny= |
[Sep. 10th, 2004|08:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  horny | ] |
Im bored. Its 8:30 on a friday. Im in the mood to party like a motherfucker. Yep. Thats about all i can say, Is that im going to party tonight, and it is going to be fun. because the whole world is busy....so perhaps i shall go be busy too. It's a friday night, i ain't got no worries, no cares.....just party. because tonight, is my night. enjoy yourself bitches. it's a celebration. |
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| hippy talk 101 |
[Sep. 6th, 2004|12:59 am] |
lEt us talk about hate. Hate is by far the strongest emotion a human has by far, I think anyone with half a brain would agree. Hate is a very strong emotion, to the point where it can actually completly take over everything, physically and mentally. To define hate hate in any other form would be modest and unjust for; "it must be hate (not fate)".
Something i think was the victim of the chain effect. So lets take the strongest good form of love; after all, every hero has a villain, and lets say 2 is nothing special...and its the onnly number one away from one. So one is the special number. Which emotion will win? Let's take captain planet, or even spiderman for all of you kids that arent old school, spiderman always wins. always. if he didnt, hed die and the show would be over and what would that mean? no more money. So the author ( god in our case? ) always makes the stronger man win. To benefit. And Hate is the strongest. So hate dominates love...in ability to affect you...after all you're only human...
But you know what. its a cycle. Hate...love. Two is an imperfect number
Back to the same theory...it is the only number one away from one..
So let's say its one. All your emotions...everything. it has to be perfect. It all can be traced down to one, no matter where you are.
LOVE. We were built perfect, assuming you believe in Christianity. We were then "corrupted". Corrupted, but still one. And that one is LOVE.
volcomgirl1986: i hate lizzie mguire...and i hate everything
Shortypop182: everything is something, so technically you love to hate. which makes one thing
Shortypop182: it is impossible to hate everything
Stop letting hate take over your life. You are the victim of hate. And you love to hate it. You are trapped. You are pathetic. And you can all fix it. First off, let everything go. all your opinions...your tone of voices, smartass remarks, avoiding...let all that go. tell them why it makes you feel a certain way. Otherwise they take it the wrong way and survive;defend. The strongest instinct.
"Life is but a lego box. some stop wasting time and get to the fun stuff. put the pieces together." © Chris thomas
There is obviously a connection between the three strongest influences on one human being why? because 3 is imperfect.
© Chris Thomas 9/6/2004 |
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| what the hell |
[Sep. 5th, 2004|09:10 pm] |
hi ho, hi ho
it's off to work we go
with hand razorblades
and hand grenades
hi ho, hi ho, hi ho
hi ho, hi ho
its back to home we go
with razor cuts
and blown up buts
hi ho hi ho hi ho |
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| liar. |
[Sep. 4th, 2004|08:12 pm] |
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Whats that?!?!....i smell bullshit! Anyone else smell that? |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 4th, 2004|04:01 pm] |
Batman's in the kitchen,
Robin's in the hall..
Joker's in the bathroom, peeing on the wall. |
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